Seasons of Life - growing old in Africa

Seasons of life - they come and go.

 

 

Age-some of us fight - others accept it gracefully.

We all are all growing older, maturing, becoming.  Aging comes to all of us.  No matter what we do, how many plastic surgeries, special creams and lotions we might use...there will come a time when we get a discount at McDonalds (I am not there yet), where the Public Transit gives us special rates, and where we are expected to just fade away and go to Arizona for the winter.  The question one should ask.  "Is there another way?"

 

I was going along Kampala Avenue down toward the City Bar and Restaurant for lunch. Throngs of people were all around me. Most of them were in their 20's or early 30's. I had gotten used to not seeing many old people. Here and there was an old woman, her face marked with the cares of this world, lines on her face like the tattoos of survival in a harsh and bitter world.

Grandmothers in Africa - filled with hope and dreams for their grandchildren.Rarely did one come across an older man with gray hair. People just did not live that long in East Africa. Life expectancy was 40 for men and 42 for women. Out in the villages you would find some older people who had survived the bouts with famine, bad water and constant attacks of malaria. In some cases they would even build up a resistance and immunity to it.

As I was walking, caught up in my thoughts, a young street boy came running up to me saying, "Poppa, would you like to buy something?"

I had to chuckle. Often I would be called that. A few times when I went shopping in the Blue Market in Nairobi with a coworker named Brent (who was approaching 30) hawkers would ask me to buy something for my son. Again I used to laugh, but it was something that made me think later on, as I sat on the balcony enjoying the night breeze and the African stars, "I am getting older." It is a reality that comes sooner or later to all of us. Aging, lines, sags, drags, the muscle tone turns to something else with some, others of us lose some hair, looks, but all of us lose our youth.

That very night I was visiting some friends of mine who lived in a slum just outside of downtown Kampala. I had parked my car and was making my way through some nondescript liquid oozing down the street as some young people greeted me with, "You are most welcome Mzee." Again it was a reference to my age. My friend was coming toward me and had overheard the remark by the young people and said, "Ah, Mzee, you have arrived, you are receiving the respect of the young people, we are most honored to have a man of wisdom in our midst." (Mzee is a term of honor and respect for an older man recognizing the wisdom gained over the years.)


I had grown up in Europe where we lived together as an extended family. I had always been around old people, receiving their input and wisdom. I used to listen to the stories of the old and sit there in amazement. There, like in Africa were not the retirement communities, there were not old age homes, there was family. One of the ironies of African culture is that while women are mistreated in their youth, and it is a patriarchal society in the minds of many a man; the reality is that because women live longer they do run Africa as they grow old gracefully.

Then I came to America while I was still young and was caught up in the myth described in the song by Rod Stewart "Forever Young."

In American society the youth culture rules. So much is done to appear young, to remain young; to drink from an artificial fountain of youth called cosmetology equally applicable to men and women in our society. Yet forever young can be reality as a young woman who was a philosophy major once told me, "Jon, age is not a number but a state of mind."


In Africa those who have grown old are sought out for advice: the old man is called Mzee. Jomo Kenyatta, the first president of Kenya was always referred to as Mzee. It is an honor to grow old in Africa. One is seen as having wisdom that comes from having lived the seasons of life. Young University students will seek out the advice of a wizened grandmother who does not even know how to read and write. Wisdom does not just come from books. As a young man I read so many books on knowledge. When I was 11 I read Rousseau and Nietsche. I had knowledge, but it was dangerous since I did not know how to apply it in grace. In fact the apostle Paul wrote, "Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up." Wisdom is an inner revelation in the sacredness of one's soul. A simple knowing brought about by life, by what I would call an impartation and a realization that what we sought in our youth was in us all along.

When I was young I thought I was invincible, would never die, then I reached my 20's and thought maybe it was possible, in my thirties I thought death would come and worried about it, in my 40's I saw a lot of death and knew it would come, so why not live the moment; now as I have turned 50 I am enjoying this season, since the inner striving has ceased, the living out of each day is real. I am enjoying the small things and thankful for each sunrise and sunset.


As I have been back in America, no one calls me Mzee, but the concept is in my heart. I have the understanding of who I am, where I have been in the seasons of life, knowing that it is neither spring nor summer, but neither is it winter, but the Indian summer of my life...
jon

 

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Last updated: 13 February 2008

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